This is the least interesting page on our website.

I can’t even bring myself to ask G to art direct it — he’d just tell me to bugger off. Or have a big tizzy and bugger off himself. So I haven’t even told him about it.

But we digress.

It’s here because the boffins reckon we’re light on a few phrases. Wanted us to put in things like:

“The Chiddingfolds is a New Zealand-based creative and strategic consultancy powered by senior creatives and strategists. We help brands develop clear positioning, smart campaigns, and stand-out communications.”

Any protestations that that all comes out in the copy fell on deaf ears. Apparently John Interweb’s spiders are as thick as pigshit, and if you don’t spell it out for them they just don’t bloody find it.

So rather than rewriting the copy and setting it in Belt You Over the Gulliver Sans Charm Bold, we thought we’d bung it in here.

So here goes.

The Chiddingfolds is a New Zealand-based creative and strategic consultancy powered by senior creatives and strategists. We help brands develop clear positioning, smart campaigns, and stand-out communications.

There. Done.

But not really, because in keeping with the notion that you might as well get hung for a sheep as a lamb, we may as well chuck a few more in:

Brand campaigns. Retail campaigns. That’s probably in the copy somewhere, but can’t hurt.

Inefficiency in advertising agencies.

FMCG. FMCG marketing.
Wouldn’t mind a car project, so how about: auto advertising. Car marketing.

Clients frustrated with over-servicing.
Wool marketing. Wool advertising. Supermarket advertising.
Fashion. Retail fashion. Mons Royale. Barkers.
Renault advertising. Ford advertising.

Client who said he'd like to fire his agency then rehire them just so he could fire them again.

Tourism marketing. Tourism advertising.
CMO. (For the sake of the spiders, that means Chief Marketing Officer.)

Bank advertising. Finance advertising. Binance advertising. Farro Fresh ads.

Agencies dying. Dying agencies.

Traditional advertising agency model pretty much f… Settle down, sunshine; we’ve gotten this far without dropping that particular bomb. Let’s finish with a bit of decorum, shall we?